Posts by Las Malvinas son Argentinas

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

This forum thread is the saddest thing I've seen in a while.

You must have missed the livestream.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

As usual most things outside of the very narrow window of JW content he is going to have a hard time with because he has to think of someone other than himself.

That's really it, isn't it? It's obviously a huge issue for him and that's all he really thinks about. How can I attach myself to this joke? After all he included it in his 9 grievances against WT. Let's take an unscientific "survey" here. Think back to when you were a doubting JW, would the masturbation ban had made the top 9 on your list of things wrong with the organisation? The prohibitions regarding sex would, but I would have rolled it all into one generalised bullet point. Mine would have been:

Prohibition against certain kinds of sex

Disfellowshipping of ones who commit fornication. (I say disfellowshipping, I wouldn't expect a church to condone it)

Prohibition against marrying/dating/having sex with ones outside the religion

I would have rolled that all up into a single entry: Policing one's sex lives. Masturbation would have been included but I wouldn't have thought to mention it directly, especially the way he did as a sole bullet point. Masturbation is really a victimless and unreported crime in the JWs. For reasons which are obvious it's very easy to get away with and generally people did. I don't get why he's so vocal about it. The only way I can rationalise it is that he considers it an essential part of his sexuality.

Well, if we are to believe the Dijana leaks and his livestream, this is really what happened especially after the birth of his second child. His sex life consisted of three things at that point: masturbation, porn, and sex workers.

Evans might be able to learn the craft. I tend to doubt it, mostly because he cannot laugh at himself and he bristles at any kind of criticism, which he would need to heed in order to improve. I just can't imagine someone being good at comedy if they cannot laugh at themselves.

Think of Eminem's act. Had he come out in the late 90's dressing like a gangster, rapping about money, women and street violence, he would have been laughed off as another incarnation of Vanilla Ice. Instead, he dyes his hair straight blonde, dresses like anyone attending a rap concert would and raps about his mum being a drug addict who lived in a trailer, his wife cheating on him, his fleeting and unsuccessful romance with Mariah Carey and generally how dysfunctional his life was.

To even have a chance of his wanking chronicles working in front of an audience, he'd have to devolve to that level and go into how unlucky he was with women before going into all this. Even then, you only want to make perhaps a fleeting reference to it. And as you said, you need to have an entertaining way to deliver it. This is not easy to do. And I don't think he wants to do this or even thinks this way. The methodical way he just lists off the sexual taboos of JWs is what really lost him the audience for good. It wasn't funny and by this time he was just preaching to them about his activism.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

I was wondering did He ever said what he wrote in his dissociated letter ? What was the reason he give?

His disassociation letter as related in The Reluctant Apostate read thus:

To whom it may concern, From henceforth, let it be known that I, James Lloyd Evans, am no longer one of Jehovah’s Witnesses—nor do I have or seek any affiliation with the Watch Tower Bible and Tract Society. Yours sincerely, [signed]

I think you might be thinking of his list of WT complaints he wrote down in his letter to his wife dated 1 January 2010. It is quoted in Footnote 100 of The Reluctant Apostate:

The nine grievances were:
(1) claims that an increase in numbers proves divine blessing,
(2) the focus on Bible prophecy applying to early Witnesses,
(3) the rules on masturbation,
(4) the denial of evolution,
(5) an inconsistent prophetic explanation in the Daniel book related to the “King of the North,”
(6) the stigmatizing of higher education,
(7) the “new light” teaching,
(8) claims that the Governing Body “represents” spirit anointed Christians without contacting them, and
(9) suspicions over the number of memorial partakers never dropping below 7,000 (as it turned out, this number would soon start rising).

Regarding Dijana's tattoos, since he opened the can of worms in the first place about not having enough for his daughter's haircut, there's yet another expense his Patrons picked up the tab on. Not a huge deal in of itself, but it shows she had ready access to the family bank account.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

Lloyd is going to get a rude awakening that people in the real world simply don't care about the kooky sex things JWs control. It isn't shocking to them, and they don't get a rise out of that content unless it's extreme.

Dave Chapelle has people rolling on the floor when speaking about highly offensive things such as the Michael Jackson and R Kelly sexual escapades. On the surface nothing is really funny about them as the allegations are quite serious, but good comedians always find a way to break down that story and find the absurd things about them.

Lloyd Evans also wants to talk about sex and there's no problem with that. A lot of comics do. But given his history, he should leave any personal anecdotes out of it. But he WANTS to. He's not embarrassed about it and it's obvious that masturbation is a primary part of his sexual identity. People don't connect with this. They find it sad actually, and don't want to hear about wanking stories.

The routine sounds like it's from a man who hardly gets out anymore. He's speaking about old events that people don't think about anymore, especially the Queen's funeral. That was last summer and if he wanted to joke about the British Royal Family, there's a current scandal that's on a lot of people's minds with Harry and Meghan. Maybe make a joke about how Harry almost froze his penis off on a trip to the North Pole? That's a penis joke people can handle, not so much when he's speaking about his own when he's on the stage and everyone is looking at him. Or perhaps Prince Andrew?

Then there were odd complaints about an electronics store having data sticks behind locked glass doors. And? They probably had a problem with those things being lifted so much and resorted to that. Lloyd calls them "the cathedral of despair" but eager sales reps preferring to sell you more expensive items like LED TVs are standard all over. What's so crazy about the store policies that he feels the need to label them as "the cathedral of despair"? It doesn't make sense.

I've been to shows where I've felt the same thing - this guy is just not reaching the crowd and his content is lame. His comedy routine is a window into how this man thinks. He's glad he's out of Sisak (and separated from his wife?), enjoys his new surroundings, still seems to think 24/7 about JWs and how they have ruined his sex life which says a lot right there regarding where it currently stands.

Lloyd's not quitting activism. Evan after all these months in Zagreb living as a bachelor, JWs still seem to define him.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

I hope you have roasted lloyd for the No 1 shittest statement by a country mile about Dijana

Dijana also freely divulged a range of concerning to down-right fucked up information about her marriage to people outside it. Complete with screen grabs, forwarded emails and WhatsApp chats she had with her husband. Had both parties in that marriage kept that info private we wouldn’t even be here.

If that had been me, I would have given him 48 hours to find other living arrangements and two weeks to get all his possessions out. I wouldn’t have told anyone other than those with a need to know.

The trigger to all that was Lloyd’s inability and/or unwillingness to understand how one-sided and unacceptable that proposed arrangement was.

The relevance of all this is also compounded by the fact that Dijana made more than one appearance on his channel and was going on about the “haters” when she knew all this time how her husband really was towards people. She was being disingenuous by spreading the narrative that people had no legitimate gripe about her husband when she knew better than anyone else what his issues were.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

That comedy routine had a major flaw: it wasn't funny.

It was notable that his biggest applause lines were for things that the audience agreed with but were in no way jokes. For example:

Saying something in Croatian

Sisak sucks and he didn’t like it

Declaring himself to be an atheist

Announcing the Queen’s death

Leaving JWs and starting a YT channel

And if you were to ask him, he’d probably tell you the audience loved his act. But they were really restless as soon as he started into the JW rules about sex. His listing off his complaints “you are not allowed to fuck someone who…” fell flat and he zipped through this portion as he was getting absolutely no audience response at all. When he got into his dad talking to him about sex, other boy’s and his penis, how he was afraid it would fill the entire room if he slightly touched it, you can hear the audience tune him out. They started speaking amongst themselves and he hurriedly wrapped it up.

Not even sure I’d give him an A for effort. The delivery was OK in the first half but you can tell he was nervous and kept rubbing his hands through his hair.

The content however was horrendous. I’d keep maybe the introduction part and how he lived in Sisak and rewrite the rest. The Queen, the shopping malls of Zagreb and the masturbation rules of JWs were horrible segments and I’m genuinely curious if he’ll change it round for the next show.

Or, he’s reading the advice here, and in his obstinance keeps the routine as is.

(Hoping it’s the latter)

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

I think Lloyd is a scumbag but I watch his videos from time to time. I watched the interview with Tibor and heard about a forum so I wanted to see it.

You don’t say? You think Lloyd’s a scumbag but watch his videos from “time to time”? This is a key passage here and also how you identify a Cedarite.

Way back on this forum they said the same thing. “I don’t always agree with Cedars but he’s dead on with the last comment!” Cedarites will always qualify an unspecified disagreement or even say they don’t support him in order to manipulate the reader into thinking this is from a neutral party.

Someone was really paying attention in the live chat on the Jimmy Snow video when Lloyd made that comment 3 hours before the show started about a certain “forum”.

And they even chose a sarcastic handle?

Also, some you are genuine pieces of shit for the things you said about Diana. Accusing her and saying she's involved in this whole mess.

You are an ignorant fool for thinking she had absolutely no involvement with this and his current grift. Who did she think paid $15K AUD and gifted their family a BMW?

Santa?

She also let herself willingly be photographed with her girls on his birthday which was promptly posted on his Twitter feed whilst at the same time he was in heated arguments about prostitutes and just days later he issued a threat to Kim he’d track her down for the next 40 years.

She enables him and benefits from the grift.

She pulled the rug out from under Kim in the aftermath of all this. She at one point complained that Lloyd followers were never going to believe her and that they’d continue to support him. That’s precisely what they did, but she retreated from all that and continued to be supported by the grift. Even going so far to go on holiday with this very man she knew QUITE well had used Patreon money to hire sex workers.

At her best she is quite ignorant and at her worst she’s complicit.

I’m genuinely glad you came. It tells me that the discussion about Lloyd is actually landing some punches and getting people to actually think for themselves.

As for you, you can go back to your Cedars FB group and tell then you really gave it to us good. And be sure to renew your Patreon pledge with is due in a couple days.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

Speechless… ffs that’s how rattled I am!

Since you “enjoyed” it, I’ll give you the whole thread. Vintage and I mean VINTAGE Lloyd. I made my own cameo appearance there. And yes, I was 100% fucking with him and looking to stir it up with him 11 years ago on that thread. The man is a serious dipshit and it worked.
https://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/228367/time-get-rid-monarchy
Oh, and this one is pretty hilarious.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

I find his comments about the late queen offensive - respect for a woman who spent 70 years in service to his country isn’t that hard and being human is the only requirement for appreciation of her work.

Kim - speaking of these “old threads”, you’ll get a kick out of these comments. Enjoy.

11530

It's been a long 9 years Lloyd Evans / John Cedars

by Newly Enlightened in

original reddit post (removed).

Las Malvinas son Argentinas

A shorter summary would be thus:

I’m Lloyd Evans and I’m English. I have lived in Croatia for 13 years and most of them were in Sisak. I don’t like it there, I like Zagreb. English people don’t typically learn other languages, but here is a Croatian sentence I’ve been practicing to say to you. We don’t learn other languages because we’re colonisers.

The Croatian word “sveti duh” sounds like “sweaty dog”. That’s how I am learning Croatian. But dogs don’t sweat.

I don’t really like the Queen or the monarchy but if I were her I’d have ordered a dildo to be placed into the coffin instead of my body.

I was a Jehovah’s Witness. But I’m an atheist now.

Zagreb has too many shopping malls. I really hate Elipso and its policy of placing data sticks behind security glass.

Did you hear that I was a Jehovah’s Witness? I stopped being one in Croatia because I couldn’t understand Croatian. I started a YouTube channel to get myself out of the cult. Please subscribe, my name is Lloyd Evans. But Jehovah’s Witnesses are a cult and have all these strict sexual rules. I don’t like them. I like to wank. They didn’t let me masturbate but I did anyway and felt bad about it. My dad told me not to touch my willy and to not touch the other boy’s willies. This made me afraid my willy would get too big and fill the room.

Thank you and goodbye.